sorry...can't help myself:


Q. What's the difference between an accordion and a macaw?
A. One is loud, obnoxious and noisy; the other is a bird.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road?
A. To get away from the accordion recital.

Q. What is the best thing to play on an accordion ?
A. A flame thrower.

Q. What's the difference between an accordion and a trampoline?
A. You should take your shoes off before jumping on a trampoline.

Q. What's the difference between an accordion and an onion?
A. People cry when you chop up an onion.

Q. What do you get when you toss an accordion off a tall building?
A. Applause.

Q. Why do some people have an instant aversion to accordion players?
A. It saves time in the long run.

Q. When does a accordion player sound the best?
A. When the tune is over.

Q. What's the definition of a gentleman?
A. Someone who knows how to play the accordion and doesn't.