It all started in a rural hospital in Mississippi, back before they had all them electric contraptions. I worked the nightshift in a ward for vegetative and comatose patients. The only way to tell if they were having trouble breathing was to go up to each patient, but I was lazy and wanted to spend time picking at my acoustic while the ward was empty at night.

So I came up with the genius idea (At least I thought it was so) of sticking an instrument in each patient's mouth. I put a harmonica in one mouth, a clarinet in another, a slide flute in another, a whistle in another. Then it was easy to tell who was breathing! My supervisor liked the idea so much I got a raise. I would spend the night picking the guitar to the music these patients were making, and I'll tell ya. You never heard music so good!

I wanted to do an act on the road, but my supervisor wouldn't let me take these guys. So I had to develop a one mand band. I played organ pedal with my right foot, a fretless bass with the toes of my left foot, I played an organ with my right hand and electric guitar, Stanley Jordan style, with my left hand. I inserted a marraca into my orifice and when I gyrated, I had some percussion.

I travelled all over the South, made some good money. The only problem was that I was getting headaches from slamming my head against the cymbals.

I went back to the hospital because I missed the music I was making with my comatose friends, but by that time, they had intensive care units and there was a new supervisor. Times change.

My headaches seemed incurable until a voodoo doctor in New Orleans told me about arranger keyboards. I realized I could get all of these sounds just using my fingers. Holy mole! What a miracle!