I tried playing by ear, but it was straining my neck muscles, so I went back to using my fingers.
Seriously, no easy answer here. My mother could play any music you put in front of her on the piano, but couldn't play happy birthday without it. She was jealous of me because I could play without music.
I can read music and when I was getting started it helped a lot. Over the years I can hear the notes and chords better in my little pea brain. Only time I would read now is if it were something really strange to me that I'd never heard.