The recent hurricanes have resulted in the discovery of a new chemical
element. A major research institution has recently
announced the discovery of the heaviest element
yet known to science.

The new element has been named *Governmentium*.
Governmentium (Gv) has one neutron, 25 assistant
neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy
neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called
morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of
lepton-like particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert.
However, it can be detected, because it impedes
every reaction with which it comes into
contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a
reaction that would normally take less than a second to
take over four days to complete.

Governmentium does not decay, but instead undergoes a
reorganization in which a portion of the assistant
neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact,
Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time,
since each re-organization will cause more morons to
become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some
scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed
whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This
hypothetical quantity is referred to as Critical
Morass.

When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes
Administratium - an element which radiates just as
much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as
many peons but twice as many morons.