My band has been playing at a certain club in Dayton, every month for over ten years. Along the way we've met some wonderful people and had a lot of fun at the same time.

As time goes by, we notice various "old friends" not coming around much any more. Usually, another person will let us know that medical issues have made it too hard for them to attend any more.

There was one couple who were there at the front table, without fail, every month. They loved...LOVED to go dancing. They treated us like kings and were very kind in their praise of our work. About a year ago, it became evident that "Rudy" had Alzheimer's. The challenge his wife faced monthly just to get him out grew quickly, but there they were...every month. She refused to let the things he loved so much drop away as long as she could do it. A beautiful sign for me of devotion, loyalty and love, despite the difficulty. His wife surely had her hands full as Rudy loved to roam the room, stage, bar, etc...One time I came back from break and found a chart missing I'd just set on my keyboard. After looking around the floor I glanced across the stage and saw Rudy studying my music. Car keys, drinks, purses, etc, were all fair game...everyone understood and helped out. His favorite song was "You Don't Know Me" and we'd play it for them every month. They'd dance right on front of the bandstand and she'd tell him, "Bill's playing your song!" He'd smile at me and I'd wink back at him...This venue has a nice sense of "community" too as most of these folks have been dancing together for over 30 years. I also remember fondly one night at closing while we were saying goodnight instead of the usual handshake and a "see you next month" I got an unexpected hug and a "thank you for being nice to me." That kind of blew me away...

A couple months ago Rudy had to go to a nursing home. I volunteered to go in and do a free show for them so he and his wife could dance together. It all worked out real nice. I played their favorite dance tunes, he smiled at me (through me?) several times.

Fast-forward to this Tuesday past and Rudy passed away at a local veteran's hospital. His wife has asked me to play some background piano during his viewing coming up, which is something I've never done before. I've played a few memorial services for people but never actually at a funeral home.

I told his widow it would be my honor to do so.

This line of work permits me so many wonderful moments and relationships that I am convinced I would not have if I were doing anything else.

Thanks for reading...

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Bill in Dayton

[This message has been edited by Bill in Dayton (edited 10-25-2008).]

Bill,

Nice story

Maybe you should think of playing & singing
Andrea Bocelli's "Time To Say Goodbye" it would be very appropiate.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BLHq7rgHOLk

Great story Bill,

I am always 'moved' when playing the venues I am fortunate to do. I choke up when I see the Alz patients, as their loved ones fight the tears. It is truly a humbling experience. Playing the senior market has opened my eyes - a good thing

Bill,
Thanks for sharing.

Working in Florida all my adult life means most of my audiences have been seniors. It comes with the territory. Many of the country club, mobile park and animal circuit "regulars" have become friends. Some have passed on.

There are a few I knew very well back when. They are now in local nursing homes and can't remember my name. But, they know and still appreciate the music.

It makes it all worthwhile.

Eddie

One of the downsides of performing at Nursing Homes, Retirement Communities, Assisted Living Centers and Alzheimers Centers is watching a lot of very nice people slowly, but surely wither away. During the past year I had two very close friends pass away, both of which were very talented musician/entertainers. Just a few days ago I discovered another old friend and very talented musician is in the early stages of Alzheimers. He is just a year older than myself, and the difficulties that the family will be facing during the ensuing months are beyond description.

Bill, I applaud your generosity and I can only hope that when it is my time to check out of this world that someone such as yourself is there at my wife's side.

Thanks for being a wonderful person,

Gary

What makes me content performing at some if these facilities is that I can put a smile on the face of some of these people while I'm there and make them very happy with my music & singing. One of the best parts is After the show when I can go out in the audience and shake hands & give out some hugs to the crowd.....it means so much to them for sure!
Live for today & remember the good times!

You're a good man, Bill. My father-in-law is a late stage Alzheimers patient at a VA. He has been diagnosed for 14 years-about 4 years longer than normal life expectancy.

He's a retired psychiatrist who supervised care of Alzheimer's patients at a local VA in the last stages of his career.

I don't play nursing homes. Instead, I play one job a week and donate the proceeds to a group dedicated to changing laws governing care levels at nursing homes. So far this year, my donations have amounted to over $12,000.00.

Being confined to a nursing home is bad enough. Add inadequate care across the board and you get a really sad situation.


how sad!


Russ

I've said this before on SZ I'm sure, but I prefer nursing homes/retirement communities to almost any other venues.

For everything from the emotional rewards to the profitability (that I think only Gary understands, lol) they're the most fun for me.

Now, mind you, those weekend gigs with the dance floor packed for 3 hours don't suck, its just business wise, you don't make the profit on them that you do at NH's...




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Bill in Dayton