Today started out like any normal day this time of year, quick show, shaved, headed out the door by 10:30 to be playing for a noon till 3 christmas party. Nothing out of the ordinary, especially when you consider that every day has been this way for the past month.

The first inkling that something would go awry was today's traffic was unbelievable--even out here in the boon docks where I live. Bumper to bumper, people cutting people off and screaming obscenities at the top of the lungs, accidents are nearly every intersection where uncaring idiots ran red lights and nut cases dialing their cellular phones and running off the road and rear ending someone parked on the shoulder. Yep, they've really got the holiday spirit.

Normally, it would take me about 20 minutes to get to the first job, a distance of just 12 miles. Not today! The trip took nearly an hour, during which time I decided to munch on some hard Christmas candy that someone gave me at last night's gig. Big mistake! Snapped a tooth off right at the gum line. Called my dentist, got the answering machine and was informed that he would be out until Tuesday the 27th. The message, however, did have an alternative dentist for emergencies and provided the phone number for him. Guess what? He must not of got the message about covering for my regular dentist--he's closed until the 27th as well.

Oh well, the show must go on. Set up the Bose PAS, had about 200 people in the big hall, everyone was in a festive mood and lots of dancers. Everything was going great until an old guy walked over to me while I was singing Shake Rattle & Roll. I guess he wanted to find out how all those voices were coming out of the system. (I use the Digitech VR when doing this song.) He walked up to the PAS, looked at it, than proceeded to put his damned foot on the base, leaned against the tower and tried to look over my shoulder. I just about went berserk, grabbed his hand and moved him away from the PAS, hit the mic's kill switch and read him the riot act. Fortunately, there was no damage to the system, however, he came real close to stepping on the connectors, which would have really pissed me off.

The climax came while trying to navigate through the maze of traffic jams to get home. Some inconsiderate a**hole decided he would ride the shoulder of the road instead of waiting until he reached the right turn lane 300 feet away. He clipped my right-side mirrow, broke the glass and figured he didn't have to stop because I couldn't get out of the traffic lane and chase the SOB down. The only good thing about this is he ran over a piece of reinforcement rod on the shoulder and ended up with two blown front tires.

The mirror will cost me about $20 at the local junk yard and takes a few minutes to replace. I had serious thoughts about running over the SOB, but then just smiled and said he owed me $50 for a new mirrow and if he didn't pay up I would charge him with hit and run. He shelled out the $50, I smiled and said "Have a wonderful day--A**hole!" and left him standing on the side of the road.

Just another fun day in Paradise,

Gary

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Travlin' Easy

[This message has been edited by travlin'easy (edited 12-22-2005).]