For me, it was always the money. I had a wife and two young children to support, house and car payments, you know, the usual stuff that most people pay every day of their lives.

As for being able to play, yep, I can play, at least enough to be a good entertainer. As I said, I never claimed to be a musician, but does that single me out as a non-professional? Additionally, I was making a great living, enough to put together 3 retirement programs for that day that I could no longer be on stage, which abruptly came three years ago. Most of the pros that I knew went to their graves having no insurance whatsoever, not enough in the bank to pay their funeral expenses, and left huge piles of dept to their family.

Now, I cannot say enough about the musical skills and proficiency of a pro player, and I knew many of them during the 30 years I was an entertainer. Many were in my audiences, none ever came up to me with a sideways look, I believe because I was working and they were not. My dad has a great saying back in the day "The only thing that money cannot buy is POVERTY - You can rent all that other stuff." Dad was pretty damned smart and most of the time, he was right about many of the issues we encountered.

Diki, I am very, very proud of the choices I have made during the past 8 decades on Planet Earth and being a professional, musical entertainer was among my best achievements. Helping others who wished to do the same was among the best achievements, as well. That's why I am still here.

All the best,

Gary

Great points, Gary.

A matter of perspective for sure, but from MY perspective, how you perceive your success in life depends a lot on where you've set the bar. Some people have dedicated themselves to their art and been criticized for it because they weren't working as regularly as their less-talented (but more business-oriented) brothers whose "good enough is good enough" approach to music were busily 'paying the rent and feeding the kids'. Truth is, there is no reason these things have to be mutually exclusive. No member of the Philadelphia Orchestra makes as much as Taylor Swift but they're able to feed their families. So, if you see a talented but unemployed classical or jazz player sitting in your audience, don't sneer at them; applaud them for their uncompromising dedication to their art.

Below is a list of artists and musicians who gave the world gifts that will endure for generations to come. They all have one thing in common; they all died penniless. Clearly they put their art ahead of living an obscure life eking out a mediocre living. But hey, to each his own (why do some people say 'each to his own'?).

Emily Dickinson. ...
Claude Monet. ...
Johann Sebastian Bach. ...
Franz Kafka. ...
Henry David Thoreau. ...
Johannes Vermeer. ...
Edgar Allan Poe.
Vincent van Gogh. ...
Mathew Brady. ...
Franz Schubert. ...
William Blake. ...
Oscar Wilde. ...
Sammy Davis, Jr.
Charlie Parker...
...and countless others..

Although I've been accused of it, I DON'T HATE ARRANGERS. I have owned about 8 and currently own 4. I just have never used one on a gig, but that's because it doesn't lend itself to the kind of music that I like to play (on stage). I've only played organ and Rhodes for all these years. I've played some amateur gigs on piano but knew I wasn't good enough to play piano on a professional stage. I do agree with Diki (and Paul) that if you're a player, the (type of) keyboard doesn't really matter that much. If you're not, then I think some form of backing tracks is a more honest presentation. I'm sure that most high-end performers, absent a live band, use backing tracks as opposed to say, live arranger-keyboard backing. But again, that's just MY perspective. Bob, my sometimes guitar player (he's fabulous), will sometimes play a chord that just makes the hair on my arm stand up and I'll say whoa....what was that...show me that chord...; usually it's something that can't even be played on an arranger except manually. Those are the times when I know I never want to play any other way, and that transforms music from a pastime into an art. So yeah, I'm sure there are a lot of 'starving artists' out there but I'm not sure they see themselves that way. Oh well, I guess once we're dead and gone it won't matter much....oh wait, yes it will.

chas

Yep, I agree, once were dead and gone, no one will even know our names a week after were gone, let alone the music we performed. I'm real close to dead, so at this point, I could care less about what people think. Chas, how much I wish we could have met on my voyage to the south Florida Keys. Stay well, old man,

Gary

Easier said than done. I'm just as old and decrepit as you; I'm just not about predicting my imminent demise....I'm going to wait and see. Who knows, they may suddenly come up with a miracle cure for old age and bad attitudes . Quite a few of us will benefit from that.

BTW, loved Larry's story about his father's musical journey. Precious memories. As to his search for the 'perfect' studio desk, I'm with you, in that the only way to get that is to build it yourself....plus, it'll probably end up being cheaper. Home Depot, 2x2's, 2x3's, paneling/luan/plywood, coner moulding, and a good design (the fun part - just copy the best features of all the 'store-bought ones) and off you go. Expect a few bruises, smashed thumbs, and curse words you didn't even know were in your vocabulary, but in the end you'll have the pride of creating a masterpiece.....OR...the bewilderment of why you ever undertook this insane project that produced this monstrosity.

chas

One thing I’d recommend if building your own perfect music production desk is (lockable) wheels or casters. It is amazing how often you need to get round the back to the cabling!