Dear UD,
Thank God you are alive! Unbelievable!
Wow, now I'm glad I live in a boring suburb.
Dave, you're always buying the latest gizmos. I'm surprised that you didn't have an eject button in your car to get rid of this guy - or something!
We are waiting to find out if your other belongings are still there. That would be a perfect ending to a Bad scene.
Take Kung Fu lessons, UD - or at least eat more garlic so maybe this sort of thing doesn't happen again.
If you're still shaken up, I know a psychiatrist (My brother-in-law) in your area, who can keep you medicated for a couple of months until you're ready to step out of your bedroom.
Next time you post something, UD, make sure it is a little more exciting, OK?
Best regards,
Beakybird