My tip is the practice, practice, practice, with her.....you both have to work as a battery knowing each other....using the "original melodic intro" of the song vs the KB style intro that shes not used to could be the problem also..
you can record some mp3 backing tracks exactly how you would accompaniment her so she could listen to the intros etc,. and practice her parts at home also ...
The tips posted are all good, but Donny's tip on the mp3s (which I have highlighted) is an excellent one ... this is something I have exchanged with a guitar player in New Jersey when we are going to do a gig together and 'live' rehearsal is limited to when we can get together the afternoon prior to the gig ...
Good luck with it, and enjoy the opportunity to gig with another LIVE human being ...
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