Uncle Dave, I see you're back... I was away for about 10 days and I lost contact. I hope everything is ok with your problems. I don't want to steer away the topic, so that's all about it.
About "Reading" and "Listening", my opinion is that Listening is more important. I studies classical piano for 10 years intensively, giving concerts, obtaining diplomas etc. But I enjoy now so much more playing things "I heard" and improvising or playing along with singers, singing my self, accompanying choirs and all this great stuff. You are much more free this way than reading the sheet and reproducing it. I've seen people who read the sheet perfectly (better than I do) and still I cannot consider them as musicians. On the other hand, I know people who have never be taught, almost never read a music note and yet they are admirable musicians.
Still I think that the best situation is when you can read and listen. I maybe didn't express it clearly in the previous post. You must know how to read and practice with it, but real music is like talking. Even if you don't know how to read, you can say great things! In other words, not listening is greater disability for a musician than not reading.