For what it's worth,
Loud bass is the real key to "feeling" the music - not loud volume. Also, the bass frequencys are not directional, so they are less damaging to the ears.
I'm sure this is not news to many of you, but this is another good justification for bi-amping a sound rig. When a dedicated amp is powering just the looooooow frequencies, you can add "punch" to the mix without increasing the overall volume. The end result is a fuller, more powerful sound that "appears" to be louder, when in fact ... only the bass is louder. It's a much smoother approach to adding guts, than simply turning up the volume.
I was never a fan of real loud music, but I understand the "impact" of moving air. Volume is tolerated differently, depending on the instrument. For example - I can listen to a blaring horn section all day, but a lead guitar ...... NO way! The "edge" cuts through my skull, and I loose the attraction for the music. Lots of DJ's play too loud because there is no "feel" from the source - they depend on the moving air to get the crowd pumped. It's the essence of Rock & Roll. It's all about the energy, but after many years ........... I've made it all about longevity. If I get loud - I am never in direct line with the speakers. It's not healthy. Too many of my friends have "ringing ears" because they didn't follow that rule.
I'm glad you learned the secret Don - that's why you're still at it........I said THAT'S WHY YOU'RE STILL AT IT !!!