Bill, I think you face the same situation that most entertainers face at vacation destinations. If I were trying to make a living as an NH entertainer in the Florida Keys I would starve to death! To my knowledge, there are only three assisted living centers in the entire Florida Keys, which spans 151 miles from Miami to Key West. However, there are likely more than 1,000 restaurants that have bars and nightly entertainment during the height of tourist season, which runs from November 1st till May 1st. From May 1st till November 1st, the keys are a ghost town and you could fire a cannon down US Route 1 and not have to worry about hitting anyone. Consequently, the vast majority of the entertainers there migrate north every spring with the snowbirds. They scatter throughout the nation, all looking for jobs in place like Cape May, Atlantic City, Ocean City, MD, etc..., locations offering the same opportunities as the keys offer during the dead of winter here.
These are the folks you are competing with in Cape May, and as you have stated in the past, there are not many assisted living centers in your area. And, like those in the keys, they tend to have a very, very low pay scale, thus making it nearly impossible to make a living. From my experience, the nite-club/restaurant jobs pay the same nationwide, about $150 to $200 for a 3 to 4-hour job. One thing I have noticed, lately, though, is the hours seem to have shifted to earlier in the evening, usually kicking off right about the time happy hour ends. The vast majority of these jobs in the Keys ran from 6 till 9 p.m., and I suspect this shift was an attempt to hold the happy hour folks longer, despite the huge increase in drink and snack food prices. Most of the time, it seemed to work in the advantage of the clubs, but not always. Down in the keys, most of the jobs were outdoor, therefore, if the weather got cold (under 60 degrees f) the crowds quickly vacated the clubs when the sun went down. If the temperature remained above 70, the crowds were huge.
Unfortunately, I really don't have a lot of hope to offer. Cape May will always be Cape May and the two hour drive difference between you and I, or you and Donny, makes a huge difference. Where both Donny and I are located, we have assisted living and retirement communities springing up like weeds in a flower garden. I now have two dozen locations within 20 minutes drive time of home, and plans for a massive retirement community have been submitted to the county council for approval. The initial facility will house about 1,200 ppl, but they are already talking of an expansion that would double the size to 2,400 ppl. This one is still 3 years away from being completed, and by then I will likely be retired.
I wish there were something more that I could do to assist you in this, but short of relocating, I really don't know what to tell you.
Of course, you could always have your charming spouse take on another job and support you in the manner you would like to become accustomed to. That never worked for me - she kept the money.
All the best,
Gary