Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll...?

In my past...mostly in college...I was only an occasional smoker of weed. And I was out of the Rock and Roll business at the end of high school...


BUT...

Sadly, my participation in the first lament of the Musician's classic description went beyond excessive, to the point where I'm now more than a little regretful.

Briefly, if I'd kept track, there would be pages of encounters
where I don't remember even first names.

There would be several pages of brief, repetitive (think 15 minute breaks) encounters that lasted years; still, no names.

I quit drinking in 1988, but, sadly, only fast approaching old age brought me around on the "other" issue. I was a social drunk (think 4 old fashion glasses of straight brandy-minimum six nights a week for nearly 30 years) AND a full blown sex addict, to the point where I only played in hotel lounges near hospitals (nurses visited before and after their shifts and airlines overnighted flight attendants). I always demanded and got a free room and free booze. As a headliner; even in a 300 seat hotel lounge, it was way too easy. I always worked it so I could leave my day job for a quick trip to the hotel.

Now, I think that addiction cost me dearly. It took my focus off the music and the business end of the music. It took time from my interaction with family and friends. I wasn't a very nice guy for a long-long time. I could have contributed much more to education and done a better job in my day "gigs".


What about you? Without revealing the "juicy" details, how did you survive the era of "DRUGS, SEX and ROCK and ROLL"?


Russ

Hi Russ...I was an ardent partaker back in the day....got addicted, and eventually, lost everything important around me, and, very nearly lost my life!

Clean and sober since 1982...no regrets; just giving someone else a turn!

Can't imagine playing under the influence of any drug or drink today...it would just get in the way.

Thanks for sharing, buddy.

Ian

I think I survived by being more addicted to the 'Rock and Roll' bit than the other two... I guess I've always been lucky in that I recognized very quickly if either of the first two was affecting the last one, and it always came first...

Not to say that I have always made the right decisions in my life, but on the whole, sticking to the R&R as #1 priority always mitigated the damage..!

I don't think anyone makes a "decision" to be or not to be an "addict".

I know I didn't.

I was (and still am) a strong willed person, disciplined in martial arts, and totally involved in music.

In my opinion, the only way a person can be certain they won't become an addict, is to not ever use in the first place.

Ian

Never tried drugs, never drank much (I'm a control freak), but the sex, Oh Lord.
I made many decisions based on letting the wrong head do the thinking. Somehow it eventually turned out right, but there many bends in the road.

DonM

I think they have stints that can fix those bends now, don't they?

I'm taking the fifth.

What started this is a photo in the obit section of the local paper. I had been with the lady years ago, and didn't treat her very nicely. Never knew her name until I read it in her funeral announcement.

Man, I'm not very proud of that.


Russ

Im still here and thats enough evidence for me ...

Drugs!? does aspirin count?

Well I have one in my heart. So far no where else!
DonM

I think I have the opposite of an addictive personality...whatever that is. (Except when it comes to Pittsburgh Penguins hockey.)



When it came to giving up cigarettes, weed, boos, etc. it was as easy as changing my socks. I always looked at them as a device that made me feel good, but never as the ONLY device that could make me feel good.

What's better than a C major chord? To my mind, not much...

I have a daughter who is currently in a methodone program to get her off pills. 8 months and she's doing really well.

I consider my self very lucky and my heart goes out to anyone who has to fight that fight...

Hi Bill, do you realize that your Synthzone Profile "Mood Smiley" shows you as feeling: 'sick'?

You can change your mood:

The smiley icon setting link is situated near the top of the main Synthzone forum page directly to the right of the words:

"Welcome" - "your user name" - "Logout" - + smiley icon.

Click on 'down arrow' to the right of this to change the smiley icon mood.
This is then reflected in the icon that appears next to your avatar pic + username in your profile, and in all your posts as well.

Never did drugs--never had the desire. Booze, I can take it or leave it. Haven't been blasted on booze since 1967, and a couple weeks ago I gave up Kickapoo Joy Juice--booze, even home made, is getting much too expensive. Just read a sign that says beer is cheaper than gasoline so drink--don't drive! Sex. Ah yes, sure brings back some fond memories.

Cheers,

Gary

Other than the fact that booze is legal, I thought these were both one and the same.

Not really, Scott. Some folks can easily become addicted to anything--even soap operas and comic books. Most of the time they can walk away with no ill effects--even with booze. One load of crack and you're addicted. Working in inner city hospitals for 15 years opens your eyes to a lot of things. You had to be there to know the difference between what life is like for a crack-head and a drunk. The drunks usually survived--the crack-heads usually didn't.

Good Luck,

Gary

I keep thinking that bass player is gonna smack Ian Dury in the back of the head lmao.

Yes of course they are. And the addiction is completely due to whether they have an addictive personality or not. I have known some people to drink, use heroin, smoke crack without ever getting addicted and just walk away. There is no drug that is a one time sure addiction for all. Then with others it is a completely different story. It all depends on the person. Most of us have indulged in a number of substances over our lives without problems. Many of those that didn't cope probably aren't around online to even respond. The only reason alchoholics survive longer is due to the legality and lower cost of supporting their habit. But addictive personalities seem susceptible to most substances. The only substance I ever had a long time issue with was tobacco ... not that I found it all that addictive but years ago it was acceptable behaviour which made it easier to continue it. Now the thought of sitting in a room full of smoke is appalling.

My only addictions where my smoking habbit (quit smoking 30 pounds ago) and my obsession for beautifull woman..

My abuse of alcohol, weed(lives near Amsterdam) and unhealthy food was more like a wrong habbit to me then actually being addicted..

Music has allways been a tool for me to either show my emotions od to change them... Playing the right music makes me relax and turns a smile on my face...


With age comes wisdom, and these days i work out a lot enjoy healthy food accompanied by an occasionall glass of wine.

Well, I started smoking when I was 15, quit when I was 30 - almost 40 yrs ago ... now I smoke cigars, but only outside, usually on the golf course or when doing yard work ... had my first in 3 months yesterday, so you can tell it's not a major thing ... never got into ANY drugs, although it was all around ... none of the other guys in the band did either, and we looked after each other ... raised on rock n roll ... sex?!? ... what's that ?????
True story ... started dating Lydia when she was still in high school ... the night of her senior prom, the band had a gig playing a college dance ... of course I took her to the prom, but afterward we made a stop where the band was playing ... we walk in and there is a girl draped over the drummer - while he is playing, and another standing next to the sax player ... it was difficult convincing her that didn't happen every gig !!! ...

And she believed you?

Gary

Actually, I think she STILL doubts it ...

I am sure I would either be dead or a drunken bum if I hadn't met and married my wonderful wife Pat 39 years ago. How does that expression go "but for the grace of God go I"?

Tom

What a topic, as a former liquor salesman I believed you had to drink it to sell it. Oh how I banged my head against the wall during those years. Of course the women were in the picture too. When I left the business in the late 70s I was drinking more than I sold. In the early 80s I had brush with death the direct result of alcohol use. Within 24 hours of that experience I put it down never looked back. That was over 26 years ago and haven't had to have a drink or a substitute.

Addiction, I've had them all, including the compulsion to overeat which is how I became addicted to competing in triathlon's and road races for the better part of 25 years. They say the last addiction one is always the toughest to give up it is! No booze, no smoking, now happily married. Starbucks coffee bold blend is my beverage of choice these days. Not sure what I'd do if they told me I had stop caffiene.

How many people here still smoke?.........
How many people here quit after smoking after a long time?

I quit 28 years ago cold turkey after smoking almost 17 years.
Never tried it again, best thing I ever did.

My last cigarette was the morning of Oct 19, 2008 when I woke up, lit up and had a heart attack.
Eddie

Eddie...you made a wise choice....hope your feeling better now.

I quit cigarettes over 25 years ago when they hit $1 per pack--Hell I'm a musician/entertainer. I can't afford them.

Gary

The price should be the least of the reasons.... at $20.00 a pack people will still smoke.

I remember when I quit smoking...I joined Smokers Anonymous....every time you felt like having a cigarette, you'd just call someone, and they'd come over and get drunk with you...

Now that is very funny

I feel so out of the loop - never smoked, never did any drugs, hardly ever drink - my vices all come in boxes marked "Korg" and "Yamaha" and the like ....

I smoked smokes, did dope, drank liquor, chased girls, smoked more smokes, did more dope, drank more liquor, chased more girls AND used nearly all the money that was left to buy keyboards.

If there happened to be anything left over, I ended up wasting it on rent and food...

Guess I was lucky - I started playing in bars at 16, and I saw all the older guys acting like .... well, like you described Ian, and I found it very unappealing. I saved all my loot for toys! (but I DID chase my share of girls - caught a few too,but that's a tale for another day!) I know I'm a minority in the performers world - never play "gigs", never buy "cigs", never dance "jigs" ... I just sing.

I don't regret for one second that I became an addict/alcoholic...I ain't proud of it, but I'm not ashamed either.

I firmly believe, that from going through those insane experiences, and eventually, finding recovery, I now have an appreciation of life that I never would have attained otherwise.

Like Dave, I have my little rhyme, "let gratitude be my attitude" that usually bumps me back in place when I wander off the path of peace and serenity.

And, like several others above, my love of music, and the marvelous gift (for which I am very grateful) of being able to express myself through it, has not only helped me through some pretty hard times, but it has opened many doors of opportunity that allowed me to give back some of the peace and contentment I was so freely granted.

Ian

Good for you Ian - you took the harder road, but we both ended up in the same place - here in paradise!
And if I'm being really honest .... stress eating is a vice, and I'm guilty of that too.

I cant get addicted to Marijuana, why i dont know and then i quit.
I was addicted to Alcohol badly but also quit in 2003.
I smoke 2 packs a day and i dont think i can quit that.

Moderation in all things...

EXCEPT moderation!

If you can't use without abusing, fine. But the ascetic life for it's own sake is for monks

Not all monks...

Or these guys...



Great documentary, BTW... these guys were SO far ahead of the curve, we are only just getting them!

Ian, you're certainly hitting on all 4 today! Good, funny, smart stuff.

You, too Diki.


As far as smoking, I smoked a pipe for over 40 years. Had over 300 pipes. Three years ago, the dentist said I had a pre-cancer place in the roof of my mouth. I had it removed and never smoked again. Good news: I got over $500.00 for my old pipes from a collector/restorer.

Go ahead and say it...I am addicted to STUFF...pipes, guitars, motorcycles...cameras...cars....lots of stuff.

A few years ago, a young lady jazz magazine staff writer and her photographer came to Lexington to do a story on a regional musician (me) who had been around a long time, was fairly well known and figured out how to make a living.


She wanted me to go on and on about a "jazzer" suffering for his art.


I didn't suffer. When asked how I made a lifetime commitment to jazz, I told her she was over-thinking things. "I mainly just wanted to get drunk and laid", I said.

When pushed for horror stories of starvation in college, I told her I ran booze to a local college located in a "dry" county in the town I commuted to the University of Kentucky from. When I graduated and got a job, I suffered from a severe reduction in income.

Finally, as the the young writer was wrapping up her third day (lots of photos at "gigs", etc.), she said, "what's next for Russ ?"

My response: " Well, I don't drink or chase women anymore, so I guess I'll just give the F*** UP!"

The little photographer fell on the floor laughing.


And, surprise, surprise, the article is yet to be published (LOL)!


I THINK I NEED HELP!

R.

Dave, there a good country song there...


Gary