A new living will...

Posted by: travlin'easy

A new living will... - 04/07/05 04:42 PM

Subject: new living will


I, _________________________ (fill in the blank), being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificialmeans. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of peckerwood politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it.If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to sit up and ask for a cold beer, it should be presumed that I won't ever get better.

When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my spouse,children and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.Under no circumstances shall the members of the Legislature enact aspecial law to keep me on life-support machinery.

It is my wish that these boneheads mind their own damned business, and pay attention instead to the health, education and future of the millions of individual who aren't in a permanent coma. Under no circumstances shall any politicians butt into this case.I don't care how many fundamentalist votes they're trying to scrounge for their run for the presidency in 2008,it is my wish that they playpolitics with someone else's life and leave me alone to die in peace.

I couldn't care less if a hundred religious zealots send e-mails to legislators in which they pretend to care about me. I don't know these people, and I certainly haven't authorized them to preach and crusade on my behalf. They should mind their own business too.

If any of my family goes against my wishes and turns my case into apolitical cause, I hereby promise to come back from the grave and make his or her existence a living hell.

Signed:__________________________

Bottom's up!

Gary
Posted by: Tony Rome

Re: A new living will... - 04/07/05 04:49 PM

DITTO!!!!!
TONY
Posted by: MrEd

Re: A new living will... - 04/07/05 05:54 PM

Gary,
Looks good, but i'd add 1 clause:

Before pulling the plug, start an I-V of kick-a-poo joy juice.

Posted by: shboom

Re: A new living will... - 04/07/05 10:15 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by travlin'easy:
Subject: new living will

Bottom's up!

Gary


Careful Gary...If they bury you like that, people are liable to use your arse for a bicycle rack!!
..."Ouch!!"



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...shboom