Bill, good luck with helping the family through this. Our thoughts are with you.
Don

SLM ... Try to look at this as a glorious opportunity to help some folks who are in serious need, especially at this time of year ...
To be sought out by others at time of need, especially young people,is really a beautiful compliment, and as UD said, they see something in you that is comforting and trustworthy ... Concentrate on the PERSON, not the physical appearance, what got her that way ("botched job") or other 'exterior' dynamics ... Obviously I do not know (nor do I need to) what your religious beliefs might be, but at times like these looking towards the Lord, or what ever higher power you might find strength in, would certainly be beneficial to both you and the family ...
I shared the time of my mom's death last February with most of my nieces, crying, praying, comforting, ... being together helped pull us through, and made our relationship stronger....
Don't worry about what to SAY .. just be there for them ...
Our prayers are with you ....
t.

Okay, thanks. They called on me for this and I really didn't know how to handle it. She had to have another surgery while we were there, the swelling is so bad. Number six. They didn't find anything. Which is bad. She looks horrible. Such a sweet lady and only about 41 or so. Wow. Miracles happen, I guess. She'll need it. Swelling like that is (to me) either kidneys or heart failing. They said "She'll either make it or not," and I believe that statement. What they meant was "Nothing more we can do."

Only the good die young. It's true.

Of course, maybe she'll make us all look silly. I hope. Thanks, I made it through the day.