I would suggest that if Colin ever plays a trumpet or harp on his keyboard then, by his own definition, he's cheating since he didn't spend years learning to blow or pluck those instruments. He is merely pushing a white or black key to produce them. If he ever plays more than one voice at a time in his registration he's cheating. If he uses auto base and drums and certainly if he ever uses Technichord he is cheating.
There are some wonderfully talented people who frequent this forum who 'play' keyboard. I know, I've heard some of their songs. If Colin objects to us using the word 'play' maybe he should just use 'create music' instead. Even at my level, which is way below others I've heard here, I 'create music'. It brings me great joy and I think Oscar would be proud for me.

Greybird